Just Us: Living the Pre-Motherhood Life With Intention (Part 3)
I’m getting a bit more vulnerable here on the blog with today’s topic of life before kids – thanks for your openness in entering this discussion with me!
Today’s post is Part 3 of the Pre-Motherhood Life series –
Click HERE for Part 1 (which also provides some background), and
Click HERE for Part 2!
In Part 2 of this series, I delved deeper into the particular “heart things” I’m working on in this special season. I wanted to continue with that a bit in today’s post, talking specifically about dealing with perpetual striving.
I’m a striver. I’m a pusher and a wisher 🙂 I’ve ALWAYS struggled with wanting the future before it arrives…and this tendency has been something I’ve dealt with since I was a child!
One of my favorite meaningful short stories is the story of Peter And The Magic Thread (if you have the time, take a minute and read it here!). Basically, an impatient young boy receives a special ball of magic thread, and by pulling on it, he can speed time along to the next stage of life – something he finds he really regrets in the end!
I can relate to Peter in that story so well. Can you? Do you find yourself tugging at your life’s thread, fighting with the present because you feel that ache of striving for the next thing?
This perpetual striving is deeply connected to contentment. Contentment is such a present-moment thing. Contentment is something we have to be intentional about: at work, at home, in friendship, in parenting, and in marriage. And unfortunately, it’s not something I’m super strong in. But if I don’t learn to deal with perpetual striving (aka, fighting it and replacing it with true peace from Jesus), I will continually be striving for the next “even better” thing all my life!
How does this relate to our pre-parenthood stage of life? If I don’t keep a tight rein on my emotions and hopes, instead of leaning into God’s perfect timing, I could be setting up sticky thought-patterns for the rest of my life. If I’m no longer wishing to add a child to our family, then I could be wishing for our baby to smile, to crawl, to walk, to be potty trained…or, goodness, to get into that one particular college! That sort of thinking needs to stop now.
(This isn’t to say that we can’t look to the future, or we can’t push to accomplish our dreams! But that kind of goal-following is something we can do joyfully, with intention, hard work, and with prayer – not out of pure impatience!)
I want my husband and my future children to know me as someone who lived life fully and in the moment, not distracted by the next thing.
Do you find yourself tugging that “magic thread” at times? Are you dealing with perpetual striving right now? How do you find contentment in each life stage?
I’m really enjoying this series! I’ve been feeling myself “tugging at the thread” and wishing this dental school phase of life was over, but you’re so right – that diminishes all the good things happening right now. Thank you for sharing!
I’m so glad you’ve been enjoying this series! Thank you for your encouragement! It’s reassuring to me to hear that others have struggled with “tugging the thread” too – but we need to remember and soak in all of the good things God’s blessing us with right now! Thinking of you during the dental school season!
I blogged about this very thing this week! It’s so important to embrace our now. God has our futures in mind, so we don’t have to concern ourselves so much with when or how we’ll make it there! If we obsess too much about the future, we’ll forget to enjoy the blessings of the present.
That is so true, Kari!! If we’re staring at the future, the present is going to slip right through our fingers! Thank you for your words of truth!
This is so important! And as someone who has always strived to live in the moment who now has a baby, I’m so glad that’s a skill I worked on before he got here…now living in the moment with him comes easily!
Chelsea, I love hearing your perspective, now that you’re a mama! 🙂 Thank you for sharing! I’m so glad that it was a skill you and your husband worked on before baby, too! I’m so happy for you, and glad to hear that you’re loving living in the moment with your new precious little one!
Love this! Just shared it in a recent newsletter. 🙂
Aww! Thanks so much, Daisy! I’m so glad you enjoyed this post! I hesitated to start this series initially but I am so encouraged to hear that others are liking it and feeling encouraged by it. 🙂
Sometimes it is hard to live in the moment, and all too frequently we don’t appreciate these moments (or stages of life) until they become memories. As a recent empty nester who still has a hard time realizing that her babies are grown up, I would encourage young couples to simply savor their precious moments together as husband and wife. Never again will you be able to focus solely on each other. Then the babies come and it’s a whole new world to savor, because in a blink of an eye they are out the door. I guess what I’m trying to say is that life goes so quickly, we need to do our best to appreciate every aspect of it.
I really enjoy your blog, Hannah! You are a very thoughtful young woman!
Thank you so much, Betsy!! I really appreciate you sharing your thoughts on this topic! You are so right – once babies come, then it will be so much harder to focus solely on each other. I want to soak in that special time with Bjorn now! Thanks for reading along and for your insight! I’m so glad you like my blog! 🙂